Why do we Fear Being Ourselves?

It’s a shame, you look around at people anymore and there is a common restriction: just being yourself. Who is it that we are out to impress? Why do so many people fear just taking steps and strides in being who they are? It’s the overall oppression that society places around the concept of ‘normal’, and in all seriousness, it’s a joke.

Society is demented

And if anything defining society as that is being kind and light about the subject. Judgment is everywhere, you have the people that feel others should kneel at their feet, the people who go over-extreme just to defy them, and then you have the several that dwindle in-between and just try to stay out of the lime-light.

All of the above is wrong though, what happened to simply just being a certain way because it is who you are? People criticize hobbies, they put one another down in some kind of race to try and feel better, but the core of the matter, simply learning to have an appreciation and feel happiness toward what you do has been lost long ago.

It’s really one of those times where you have to stop and think for a moment and see the truth behind it all. Where did this fear come from? The answer: role models, and people we look up to.

When people we look up to create a negative vortex

It should be clear at this point that people as a whole drive me borderline crazy. Sure, there are awesome people out there, I’m not taking away from that. There are people that will be there at every problem you encounter, offer emotional salvation during the most heart-wrenching times, but more often then not the people we encounter are selfish, ignorant, and negative.

People began to fear simply being themselves when people they held a high opinion towards began to view their hobbies and interests as stupid, and refused to acknowledge the great things about them that make them an individual. It’s easy to dislike a majority of people when you take the time to notice how much power they have in preventing someone to become everything they are meant to be.

Personally, I’ve found quite a joy in making people feel awkward when I am out and about because I speak my mind. I’m not afraid to be myself, there is nothing that can be said or directed at me about things that I value, or hobbies that I love because I view it as they are meant to be: things that I care about.

Since when did other peoples values and opinions toward your personal hobbies, feelings, and other things associated with regular living hold such power? Well, that moment happens to be the moment that many of us stop respecting ourselves.

Great people became great because they stood by themselves

One thing is factual, there is a large difference between constructive criticism and negative influence. It’s one thing to point out errors or problems in something and offer words of encouragement and suggestions to improve, it is another to voice an outright dislike about something and discredit something ‘just because’.

The one thing that you learn over time is that you can have pure control over your hobbies and the things that make you happy, the people that discredit what makes you happy, it is ultimately your choice to keep them around. A person or thing only has power over your own personal well-being when you give them that opportunity, the people who are consistently negative, what are you losing in letting them go?

People that have made themselves great and observed as ‘great and incredible’ minds in the roots of history are all people that were told that they couldn’t do it. They were told that they were wasting their time and that they were living in a dream world, up until that dream became reality. They gave the big middle finger to those whose opinion held no bearing. That very mental concept should be put into effect in everyones life.

Being yourself is about you

Depression is something that plagues more then a few of us, as a matter of fact it is far more common then happiness and the reason behind it is simple, people stopped believing in themselves.

Self-esteem is one of those things that has a tendency to get crushed once an individual experiences enough negativity in a lifetime, but take it from me, it doesn’t have to last forever. You have to convince yourself that your hobbies and that the roots of your happiness are things that you have to achieve on your own. It is one thing to enjoy something, and another to rely on it solely to feel happiness.

I am someone who has a self-esteem that got stomped into the ground, and many days it is something that still feels fractured and broken, but the fact is, not every day feels that way. It’s the fact that I can find happiness on my own. When you convince yourself that happiness is a possibility, you are one step closer to obtaining it. When you recognize feeling bad is normal and find the roots to that feeling, you take a step in having a little more control over yourself.

I guess I write this because I know what it feels to be put down and to feel like your best is never good enough, but that is all the more reason that I emphasize that other opinions don’t matter THAT much. Not to the extent you have to live in shame and feel like a mistake or failure, screw all that. When you live under the spotlight of judgment the only opinion that truly matters in the end is your own, and the recognition that you put in your best efforts.

Life is about enjoying what matters to you, appreciating hobbies and recreational ‘blank’ because it is something that offers you the chance to feel a few episodes of euphoria. If you feel broken, hurt, alone, or whatever the case may be, view it for what it is: temporary.

Control is something that we can acquire, the first step is recognizing where change needs to be put into effect.

Be yourself, and be happy with who you are. Outside opinions don’t mean a damn thing.

 

A link to some great quotes about being yourself:

http://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/be-yourself

http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/be_yourself.html

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