Men are Assholes, Women are Unpredictable

We live in a society where labels are generated on a near regular basis, and that is exactly what fueled the idea of this post, a small analysis on the male and female psyche. This is all meant in good fun, so read it with that in mind, and rather then get mad, take a moment to laugh at some of the bitter truths about the world:
The fact is, both sides of the playing field, men and women, often think very VERY differently. This isn’t to say one way is necessarily ‘better’ than the other, but it is to say that the differences are enough that they are fairly easy to point out.

Men are Assholes, Women are unpredictable

A general consensus between male and female roles and titles is this: Men can be labeled assholes, we are in fact, predictable. Women on the other hand are in fact, unpredictable, which is why it is that much easier to call the lot of you crazy, it’s not a bad thing, it simply is what it is. Further proof:

If there is some kind of messed up situation and you ask a man’s friend how the given man would react, the answer would be one of these:

“He would probably get pissed off”

“He probably wouldn’t give a shit”

Aside from those reactions the likelihood of it being anything else is unlikely. There may be further definition as to why he would be angry or not care, but that about sums it up. Men are predictable, and in a way we like it that way.  Emotions are a very confusing thing and the more men tried to understand it, the more wine and spirits began running low on inventory. Solution? We keep it simple, it’s a “we love” or “we hate” kind of routine to us. Black and white world, it works for us.

Women on the other hand are unpredictable. Their reaction to life’s particulars can be fueled by a number of different things. It could depend on the other emotional baggage currently taking place in their life in addition to how they would normally view a situation. Thoughts change frequently, most women try to see the better of things in a situation, and ultimately approach the world with a mindset of finding the positive and blocking out the negative. That right there shows you the complexity to how a woman thinks, not a bad thing, simply something that us cave-men related men would prefer not to do.

An example of thought is driving

Put a man and a woman on opposite sides of the road at a stop sign, what do you think would happen? Easy, the man will wait until the end of the world before he tries to go first. Now the smooth thinking man goes with the idea: ladies first and all that, but the real truth, even if the woman says you can go first, who knows if she will change her mind?

Women are famous for changing their mind, face it, it’s true, and it’s funny. the routine journey to finding happiness and satisfaction for a woman constantly changes. Again, not so much something you can label as a ‘bad’ thing, but it’s something that men simply don’t do. We normally discover the things that make us happy, bookmark it in our mind, and let it be that things that keep us happy and avoid navigating away from it in all ways possible.

Most men hate change, women find it exciting

Take a man that is used to a schedule of sorts and propose the idea of a bunch of changes, the man may nod his head in a mesmerized kind of terror, but it is not something we look forward to. Men like simplicity, we like things to be clear, efficient, and make some sort of sense. Change means work that is almost always unnecessary, sure, we can make the changes, doesn’t mean we like it. We’re able to change, just honest enough to call it for what it is most of the time: bullshit.

Women find change to be exciting, the opportunity to try new things, learn new things and test out new approaches to life and its many mysteries. Men can take this same journey playing a round of Last of Us and finding a new way to flank the enemy and shoot them with a bow. (That’s a video game if you didn’t catch that)

Men are negative and honest, Women are positive but dreamy

Outlooks on the world are entirely different. You know the casual question “How are things going?”. Most of the time if you ask this to a woman, even if her life is in pure chaos, she will say:

“Things are great”, or “Things are okay”, but you will rarely if ever here them spill that their life at the given time sucks. 

Men on the other hand, if we are having it rough you will hear us say:

“Life is shit”, or reference that we intend to blackout later to run away from this steaming pile of nightmare. 

Fact is, men tend to be a lot more blunt about things, most of the time. You have your occasion of the woman here and there that can be blunt, but no one quite like a man when it comes to simply spitting out the negative shit that is going on with our life.

Women tend to be more optimistic and even dreamy when it comes to life outlook. It’s a good thing, men tend to blend with the negative essence of things and in a way, it becomes its own spiritual journey for us, a journey to display this negativity with anger and other emotions.

The idea of advice

There are some situations in life that are simply hopeless. They are miserable fragments that we live and have to get through and often times there is a lot to learn from them, but in regard to advice, there is none that can be given. It’s simply a tough time that we have to endure. Women do not understand that sometimes there is no advice to be given, example:

Ever been the guy that listens and hears out a problem that is currently going on in either a girlfriends life or a friends life that happens to be a girl and once they explain it all you have to say is: “That sucks”? Once you say it the reaction is almost immediate, they go off about “Where is the sensitivity” or  “Thats all you have to say?”, and most times, Yes, that is all we have to say. Sometimes we will add in “As time passes it will get better”, but that is about as deep as many of us will go.

Men understand that advice from our perspective is simply having someone there to listen. It isn’t about finding answers, it’s about having someone that can simple hear us complain, without interruption (which that can be quite challenging), and once we are done drop it like it didn’t really happen. Men sharing feelings, when we do, is quite a genuine thing. We don’t like to put ourselves in a position of vulnerability, if a man is spilling his guts, there is a very solid ground of trust there, embrace it.


Men and women tend to think on two entirely different levels, in a way once you understand it, it helps with how you approach things. You don’t even have to understand it, you have to accept it thought.

We often make the mistake of wanting the other side (men wanting women, and women wanting men) to view it from their perspective, their eyes, and in truth, it’s good that we don’t. We both build ourselves up to an end-game where we know how to handle things from our side of the field, our understanding of it.

It’s that exact reason that men and women have a certain level of dependency on one another, it’s why one person can complete another. We both have a unique understanding of the world, and often times it is only half of what the world is truly about.

Ah, nice twist at the end wasn’t it?


11 thoughts on “Men are Assholes, Women are Unpredictable

  1. Well, nice post you have written there! Of course much of it is intuitively very true and can easily be seen in everyday life. (Don’t get me started about my ex-girlfriend or some female friends of mine^^)
    But I think one point you take a little too much for granted is:
    “both sides of the playing field, men and women”…
    Well, I think there are many more sides to the field than two. People from different countries might think different, young and old often think very different, rich and poor people… I am not questioning the point you are making, I just want to draw attention to one simple fact:

    Gender/Sex is only one aspect of many that influences the behaviour of individuals. Especially when it comes to age (young and old generation) you might think of very big differences that have nothing to do with gender. So instead of talking of a two sided field, I would like to think of a multi sided polygon.

    However, those two sides of the polygon you have covered well 🙂

    Greetings, The Author


    • Hello Author,
      You make a very valid point, I could have tied in the various angles that different ethnicity and nationality bring to the table, but that would have taken the blogs length and easily brought the word count to about at least 10,000 words. 🙂 Very fair point though. When you tie in the change of power that takes place from one nationality to another (areas of responsibility that are placed around female/male roles in a given lifestyle) it can get very interesting.
      I’ve written about various native tribes in the African region that places a role around the man that would never be accepted here. this post was meant to be based around the observation of the common man and woman as we know them :).
      Thanks for dropping in.


  2. I smiled the whole time while reading this. Because your take on it is completely true. In fact the very same arguments you’ve used have been a marriage long conversation between my husband and I (and we’ve been married for 16 years). 😀

    Great insight. You understand women more than you probably realize. Word to the wise… if there is a woman in your life, or in the future, don’t let it be known that you do understand how we “work.” You’ll be expected to be psychic. 😀


    • Haha,
      I try to understand, it is a very complex and confusing road. The male side of thing just makes more sense (primarily because I am a man and embrace my assholeness). Viewing things from an amused perspective, that is something that makes understanding a bit more manageable, haha.


  3. I loved it ! You absolutely make perfect sense ~ as I was reading it I said to myself , This is why they balance each other out, cause they are opposites 🙂 and you stated that in the end… Well done ! 👏👏👏 however, I do know some men who fancy a little change from time to time and men who enjoy a little mystery and excitement. 😊 I on the other hand have always been extremely positive with everything in my life but I stay honest. I’m not afraid to admit when I’m having a shitty day it’s fun to vent and laugh about it later on. This post was somewhat familiar to the book men are from mars women are from Venus, BUT I loved the way you explained it ! I should talk to you when I need advice about men 😉 and I would buy your book if you published one.


      • Trying to figure out what a woman wants is the equivalent of a man playing by a campfire with a big jug of gasoline, the more we play around with the idea the harsher the burns become, when we make the effort to dive in and give it our full attention we end up getting burned to death, haha.
        Kidding aside, on both sides of the playing field both men and women suck at figuring each other out. It’s the whole theme behind fights in a relationship, it’s all baby steps to figuring each other out, pissing each other off in the process and, and gradual development that leads to a closer relationship, haha.


      • Hahahahah …. I don’t know about all that ! I think if 2 people are friends 1st then they will have no problem figuring that out 🙂 you get to know the person for who they really are and see it they are worth sticking around for ! Then again ~ not everyone will show you how they really are … I believe different people bring our different demons in you. Guess you just have to find the one that brings out the great things 😉


      • I think that if 2 people can accomplish friendship it is a very rare thing that it should ever grow beyond that. Friendship is forever, the people that you decide to date, you can attempt friendship, but the likelihood for their to be encouragement when other people come into the picture, rare. Once the heart becomes involved all rational thought is out the window.


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