This is a story from my old blog, amusing none the less, so figured I would post it up here and let people read about a night of me somewhat losing my mind.
Desaparecidos at Joyce Manor February 27th
It was February 27th, and it was my first adventure to go and see a ‘live concert’. It wasn’t that I hadn’t seen live music before, just never got out to actually see a concert. My wife encouraged me that it was something I had to check out and do, so hell, I figured why not? Originally her first suggestion was a Marilyn Manson concert, now don’t get me wrong, I do like his music, but putting myself in that first ‘live concert’ scenario at a concert that wild, just wasn’t my idea of a cup of tea.
So, we decided to start at what she called ‘Folk rock’, the band was Desaparecidos, and they were playing at Joyce Manor. That band is so difficult to spell I actually had to go into my google mail to simply copy and paste it to get it correct.
Now, I was led to think this was some kind of country-ish thing, laid back atmosphere, calm people, people just enjoying the tune, I, was severely misled. More on this later.
The arrival in New York
We arrived at New York in the Manhattan quarter around 10 in the morning. I am a complete and total suburb boy, so stepping into the big city, let’s just say I enjoy my quiet suburbs. Nothing wrong with the city life, just not what I’ve grown around, and let’s face it, the taste of familiar home is always the genuine foundation of comfort.
We check into our hotel, it’s quiet, well minus the toilet that once you flush it sounds like the pipes are going to burst. It became a note-to-self, don’t flush unless absolutely necessary, and while in theory that might sound gross, the alternative of drowning sounded worse at the time.
The first thing I got to notice about New York was the friendly population. I saw School buses drag racing, another woman ram a taxi cab driver, and the streets were FILLED with people. Reference point back to quiet suburbia: what the hell was going on around me? Anyway, I did come out of this with the firm understanding to where Grand Theft Auto and Twisted Metal game series had been brainstormed, hell, after seeing all that I could put together a violent way to get over road rage as well. We got some lunch and headed back to the hotel.
Fast forwarding to concert time
Well for beginners we had to walk a mile to this Joyce Manor place, not being from New York, this really plays a disadvantage. Joyce Manor apparently everyone seemed to know about, but their reference of ‘1st street to 8th street, then you take 4th and go to 7th’, yeah, I proceed to write out directions from map quest.
Map quest has been notorious for screwing over drivers, well guess what, they screw over people who are walking with their fine tune of directions too! Awful, completely awful directions, but lo and behold we eventually arrived. Joyce Manor was a beautiful building, and outside of it was a very interesting crowd
We approach the person accepting our tickets, and like every concert you get this little bracelet thing that signifies you paid for your ticket and are meant to be there. You are also told you are a prisoner to this place until they are done playing because apparently you aren’t allowed to leave the building and come back, I guess they would be afraid you might go get drugs or something, did they even check what anyone already had on them? Nope, no they didn’t.
The Entrance to Joyce Manor
I walk in with my wife and I begin to look around and the first thing that hits me is, this is not laid back. This is not going to be laid back, what the hell has she has gotten me into. Again, I love music, I’m just not much the type to like a loud crazy surrounding, call me nuts?
The bands begin to play and it is a mix between punk and rock- Again, I will repeat, this is not country-ish, the woman to the left of us is drunk with her ‘girlfriend’, and when she isn’t toppling over she is licking her girlfriends face, or stumbling to climb her like she’s a damn tree to ‘get a better view’ of the concert. I will also state, we were in the front row. There was no better view, this moron simply wanted to flash the band, much to her disadvantage, many punk artists swing the other way as an act of ‘defiance’ toward society. Easy, I’m joking, and all in good fun.
The bands are all shouting, I’m looking at my wife like hey, the music is kinda fun, but what the hell is going on around us? And why the hell do I keep getting bumped by people I’m starting to get pissed off? The response I get:
Wife: “It’s normal, people all want to be in the front so they start to shove through”
Me: “If I get bumped hard enough I’m going to throw an elbow and that will be the end of that”
Wife: “Don’t you dare embarrass me, it’s normal”
Me: “I don’t give a shit I don’t feel like getting rammed, we’re not animals”
Luckily, I didn’t have to throw any elbows, but something else did happen. Apparently among the civilized crowd we were in, the person next to my wife couldn’t walk the distance to the bathroom. He apparently whipped his ‘thing’ out I will refer to it, and began to pee on the floor where he stood. My wife even got to have a little of it on her shoe, talk about a great addition to the night
The nights end
So the good time of Joyce Manor ended and it’s late at night and my wife wants to wander New York City. I was at the point where I had, had enough craziness, I was ready to get back to the hotel and ‘cuddle’. That was my terminology, right outside the concert hall, in front of the crowd of al flavors, I wanted to go back to the hotel room and cuddle now!
And that was the truth, on top of not wanting to wander the New York streets that I knew nothing about and find myself as the new concept for a Law and Order episode. Nah, New York wasn’t that scary, but I still didn’t want to wander where I knew nothing about at odd hours of the night.
So we went back to the hotel, went to sleep, and ended up returning back to the normal routine of life the following day.