Dare to be Normal

I wrote this as a short story in what was called a “quest for normal” let me know your thoughts::
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I Want to be That Way- The Confession of a Patient
It seems like every day is filled with a new set of questions:
1. Who you’re supposed to be
2. What you’re supposed to be
3. How you’re supposed to act
4. Intolerable behavior
Who exactly sat down and wrote this guideline to life? I’ve seen the ‘deemed’ professionals ranging from various shades of superstardom, whether it be:
• Dr. Phil
• Montel Williams
• Maury
And various other talk show hosts that analyze and evaluate how society ‘should be’, the problem is there are so many variations of this ‘normal human being’ personality that I’ve seem to completely lose focus. What is normal anymore?
Society is a collaborated bias of opinion, and that is the very root of the problem. Favorable opinion doesn’t generate the label or ‘correct’, it only dictates the idea of being ‘popular’. I’ve read so many self-help books that I decided to not pay the rent simply to try and better myself, now the books can really help me when I burn them to keep me warm.
I Just Want to Be Accepted
The society standard of what’s acceptable is all over the place. The more you try to control the more likelihood there is for rebellion and the hovered concept of ‘outcast behavior’. When you just want to be normal it’s as if anything you do that isn’t deemed as completely morally right makes you a terrible person, well I simply can’t come to terms with that.
Isn’t life about exposure? The strongest adaptable points of our behavior coming from the mistakes we make and why we shouldn’t do them? Or is it more normal to simply be swayed by the opinion of those who like to dictate the terms of what should and shouldn’t be, when in fact all they share are words that are easy to agree about on account of being so innocent?
Imagine a world filled with people who never took risks, and did absolutely no wrong, and what would we be left with? Like it or not we would be the equivalent of a society of robots incapable of our own choices, and that would simply be boring.
Normal is What You Want it to Be
The quest to be normal is based on the image you paint inside your mind. If you feel you aren’t a normal kind of individual, chances are you probably aren’t. However, that doesn’t make you ‘not normal’, it simply makes you in regard to ‘public standards’ not normal. It doesn’t change the fact that to your standards you are beyond normal, you are the definition of it.
The concept of a label is one that dictates so many foundations of life and choice that when it is given too hard of a push it becomes a borderline corruption inside the idea of being an ‘individual’. When you can define normal send me a postcard because by the time we can all agree on it I’ll be inside a white padded cell because my head will need the genuine comfort of down-feather padding.
Society speaks and the World Listens
When a trend of sorts is marked ‘acceptable’ by society it becomes more than a trend, it becomes a popular thing people should strive to be. On the opposite spectrum of this idea, when an idea or trend is shunned it is labeled ‘weird’ or ‘different’. My point between the analysis of these two things is that each of these receive labels, one in a negative light, the other in the positive, but between the two where does normal have anything to do with either?
Normal is a standard we can set on ourselves and what we wish to be; the quest for normalcy is what one decides to make it for themselves.
An individual striving to change habits or various fragments of their personality, how does that make them any different from the person who is completely set with who they are? The very concept of self-improvement is more defined in the individual with problems and the pursuit to fix them. Wouldn’t it be safe to say the one striving to improve is more of a contribute toward society than the one that is simply lazy and says
“I’m great just the way I am”
Or by society standard is it a positive thing to feel accepting toward who we are as human beings and comfortable with what makes us that person. Something to think about isn’t it?
Why accept anything about ourselves when the world in itself is in constant improvement? Shouldn’t that be a notion in itself that we should be like an evolutionary wheel? Never set, never tame, always on the run toward change? Maybe it’s a contradiction that people and society expectations should be entirely separate concepts, or maybe we are far too down the line for that kind of adjustment and the idea of ‘error’ and ‘miscalculation’ is all part of being normal too.
Why Doubt When You can Just Agree
When you hear an accepted idea that has already become a standard in one way or another to shrug your head, whether you agree or not, is normal. Does that mean if you disagree you are against the idea of being normal? It certainly makes you different to not agree to the ‘popular’ analysis, but where is the separating moment between ‘different’ and ‘normal’, and what doesn’t allow them to be the same exact idea from a different point of perception?
When you hear an individual on a quest to become ‘normal’ the question rises once again, what does it really mean? Give me an answer to that and I’ll write you a self-help book that can actually contribute toward a better society as opposed to these compositions of literature that simply lead you on a path to replicate how the author thinks.
Taking into consideration the power of expression, the freedom of speech, and the overall idea of ‘individuality’ is far more than a simple reference point of what creates a personality. In fact, it’s the very components that create the art of being normal. When we quest to be normal, we actually quest to simply be ourselves, and for better or worse accept it is who we are. Normal can’t be defined because it falls far beyond the bounds of consistent definition and to grant anyone the power to label such a thing would simply require far too much money.
Seriously
We are interesting and different in our own special ways. Our differences define individuals, they allow people to exceed in things that would otherwise be impossible on account of the fact that ‘talents’ in themselves are ‘differences’ from one person to another. Take away the difference, the unique, and the socially unacceptable and what remains is a plane composed of a large population that all think and act the same—and that, would be terrible.
“Am I right? Am I right? I mean come on Dr. you’ve been seeing me for how long? And how many books have you written from the notes you’ve taken down? Face it, you aren’t the knowledge behind those thoughts, you’re one of the boring robots I mentioned! If you could think for yourself you wouldn’t have to write down every little thing I said to simply make yourself seem like you’re worth employing to evaluate the degenerates of society like myself!”
At this point the Dr. began to shrug his shoulders and stare in disbelief. The argument of his patient has taken his mind by the corners of their creativity and forced him to listen. What was normal again anyway? Somewhere in between the rant he grasped a strong concept of it, and then it was lost from another brilliant point made. Who was trying to be normal anymore? Himself, or his patient?

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Broken Picture

This poem may suck, but then again, just toying around with different styles:

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Title: Broken Picture

Trying to see
Who still stands by my side
I’m picking apart
The lies and their ties

I’m sore and I’m seething
In tired of breathing
Yet something inside
Is itching to get even

I’m aching, I’m breaking
I’m fueled to keep hating
I saw the dark tide
Yet I kept on forsaking

Who would have known
You’d be the knife in my back
The puncture that bleeds
And the bones that will snap

It’s that rush inside me
Yet it’s starting to slow
I’d tell you the outcome
But who really knows?

It’s the blood that is dripping
It’s the back and the whipping
And that need inside knowing
I was right all along

So take my wrist
Engrave my fist
Things are about to change
Taste my kiss
Embrace the pain
I’m about to rewrite your name

When inside is filled
Stained with time
All the pain, and more to find
As my eyes change
They taste your fate
They watch as will
Will let you break

I’m watching, I’m knowing
The future is slowing

Yet I’ll be there, to watch you fall
As the broken picture on the wall

Perish

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Title: Perish

The image burns into my eyes
The taste of tomorrow a figment
The imagination tied to this hope
Is stagnant, now broken inside
Feel my skin, cold to the touch
Life that’s become a bit too much
Whispered words to carve a tale
TO give you something to believe

What would you think of me
If I were any different?

The shadows stitched to my back
The blade that settled deep inside
The path that led away from me
The final push to the edge
The nightmare that became a reality
The image that stained my heart forever

I see, yet feel nothing

The noose that captured my hopes
Tied away my dreams
Misled my eyes to what ‘should be’
I felt the pulse fein
I watched everything dissolve
In a final effort to save it all
I was bound, helpless, and frail

As I watched everything I knew, perish.

Confidence and You

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Why Confidence Matters

For beginners, let’s establish one thing, cockiness and arrogance are an entirely different ‘flavor’ than confidence. Confidence has to do with a self-belief in yourself and your own abilities. It’s knowledge branded with the idea that you are accepting toward who you are, and what you are. Cockiness/arrogance is the ‘delivery’ of acting like you are better than everyone else, and that you have no faults/are incapable of error. If you are cocky and arrogant, you are shit, you are annoying, and yes, the world hates you.

Confidence is part of the recipe of success, if you feel that you can’t accomplish anything, chances are others will pick this off as well.

Everyone should essentially be accepting to who they are as people, and the image they have in the ‘physical’ sense. This is because everything about you: personality and image alike are subject to change with the proper devotion of time and effort.

Therefore, if you are one of those people who complain about being fat, complain that your ‘ass’ looks too big, or simply complain in general, please, for the sake of those you truly care about, shut the f*** up. <<<<look at that, I monitored that one. If you aren’t happy with yourself, get off your ass and do something about it. Bring yourself to a place where you can accept yourself, because confidence has direct relevance to success, and achieving it.

People can stop believing in you, but in the long run, these people mean nothing. Anyone who makes the choice to give up on you, you are better off without. Be confident, as long as you don’t quit on yourself, then you haven’t failed. The moment you throw the towel in, yes, you’re a failure. Not because of things you haven’t achieved, but because you have convinced yourself that you can’t be better, yet, you can, it’s not over until you stop trying.

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Not good enough

The phrase ‘I can’t’, outside of some very complicated procedures that could result in great harm, should be banished from the English vocabulary. At one time it may have been a sincere statement, but as our generations begin to age, and new generations emerge, it’s safe to say there are too many ‘soft’ people. There are simply too many people who are lazy, unmotivated, whiney little shits. I find it far more common to find people with their hand out saying ‘help me’ than the people who want to take life by the throat and find their own way. What the hell happened to self-sufficiency and wanting to handle things on your own? It drives me absolutely crazy.

Everywhere I go I see people that are homeless, holding signs that say ‘help me’, screw that. Don’t get me wrong, it’s sad, the homeless part of it, it’s beyond difficult and I can’t imagine how tough it is to deal with, but if you think holding a god damn sign is going to do a god damn thing to solve it, it’s not. Want pity? Not going to get it from me. There are some heartbreaking stories regarding some of these people, and they should be treated with kindness, they are after all people, but they also have to figure out for themselves, it’ time to bring the fight back to life.

This is a topic I’ve consistently debated, wanting to consistently help people with their hound out, it’s generous to an extent, it’s even admirable in some ways, but I don’t see it as a solution. I don’t see it as trying to guide them back to a normal life.

Me, I’m an asshole, but I’m honest. In my eyes, they should be off trying to change their situation, not dwell on it and seek pity. Want solution? Go to a shelter, raise hell, research legalities, and press them hard enough to offer the aid that you need. A library is free, knowledge is power, put it to use.

There is no such thing as being ‘not good enough’, there is only the idea of ‘trying’. Whether you are an expert or not is one thing, but anyone is capable of handling the common tasks of life.

Complaining is annoying

I complain a lot, I do. I will own up to that again, but things I complain about, are legitimate quarrels. I find that people love drama, they express it by complaining, and therefore, you hear complaining more than you hear normal conversation. I think this is why I’ve developed a form of social anxiety. When I hear people talk with dramatics I get this little ‘fortune teller’ urge that tells me they are going to come off in a way that has me wanting to run in the other direction. Most times, I’m pretty damn accurate.

I find people who are simply laid back and ‘at ease’ with their current life situation to make the most sense. They are satisfied with the simplicity of watching television and letting life pass by, these are the ones with a grip on life. This theme of life having to constantly be filled with ‘life’ and ‘energy’, well, I think that stage of hyper passed for me at the age of 5 give or take, after that I was kind of happy with consistency more than crazing.

You can’t expect life to be forever filled with ‘life’ and ‘energy’, one: to achieve that you would have to be rich as hell, many are not. Two: if life was filled with life and energy all the time the supply of prescription drugs would run out quickly because Adderall would become a medicine that became extinct in an effort to ‘maintain’ energy, and Xanax would be following right behind it as an effort to deal with the people speeding around like they don’t know how to take a fucking nap.

Anyway, the fact is, it’s simply not how people are built. There is a time for ‘energy’ and a time for ‘relaxation’, without the healthy blend of the two, well, that’s a gateway to hell J

Just a rant—and a slice of common sense

The 6 Steps to a Successful Marriage

The 6 Steps to a Successful Marriage

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The key to a Successful marriage

A marriage is something that is truly delicate; it’s also a HUGE step in a relationship. A lot of people take it without the proper consideration at to what exactly they are getting themselves into, and the divorce rate shows exactly what I’m talking about.

My wife would argue that I should be the last person that is discussing the ‘successful marriage tips’, and hell, she could be right. I stick with the notion that ‘what works’ is truly a matter of opinion. We all have an opinion, and those who don’t speak it, that’s because life has beaten you down to the point that you are now a mime and a mute, you simply nod your head.

Given that, that, is absolutely no way to live, I’m going to give ‘Sean’s’ own opinion on what can make a marriage work and last to the good times. A successful marriage relies on factors and concepts and I will give you the analysis that revolves in my brain ‘dun dun dun’ here it comes:

Tips to a successful marriage- From a married man

  • Try not to smile too much- If you smile too often, you seem ‘too’ happy. Happiness is something that comes round once and a while, and if you abuse the feeling, you will forget what it is. Happiness becomes that dirty little secret, if one of you is miserable it’s going to be a target of frustration “Why the hell are you always so happy?,” go on, deny it, it’s the truth.
  • The woman is never wrong- As men; we are bound to be the ‘error children’ of the world. We are without depth, and clearly, our life experience does not count. With this in mind, a successful marriage is one where the woman can commit no wrong. She is a vast vessel of knowledge of the purest caliber. Men are given the image of cave men that scratch their ass and don’t know how to do anything right, up until shit hits the fan, then we are supposed to morph into hercules and defend all honor, that is as long as you are respecting ‘space’ and not being over-protective 🙂
  • Her friends ‘rock’- Your wife’s friends have to be cooler than yours. Their stories HAVE to be interesting (yes I know…brutal) and under no circumstance can you be mean to them. They are after all, the ‘family’ your woman chooses. A successful marriage means accepting family. When they talk about a trip to Dunkin Donuts and turn it into half hour story where Abu behind the cash register winks at the girl, it becomes a full-fledged romantic story where at one point he proposes and offers a private jet trip to India. I know, kidding, not everyone that works at Dunkin Donuts is Indian, it’s just a stereotype I’m having fun with. Oh, the romantic story? No, that really happens.
  • Your mother-in-law is an angel- Again, this is where you might as well get some Vaseline, because the friction when you bend over and take certain things can be quite painful. A successful marriage means your mother in law can do no wrong, and anything she does wrong is not of ill will, it is a mistake, and it should always be forgiven. Oh don’t pay any attention to the financial deficit it has sent you through, everything is okay. Up until you can’t help the in-law when they speak you are the god-son, the moment you can’t help, well, they are awesome at suggesting replacements for your ass to their daughter 🙂
  • Money is of no object- You are going to be the entrepreneur of the century cause guess what, us men have the secret to growing money trees. We have discovered what science cannot; we can take a penny and grow dollar bills from the ground. A successful marriage operated on the principal that you have so much money that you can never spend enough. $200 dress? Sure throw it in the bag! Who needs rent when you can hang out in an alley wearing that?
  • Accept you’re a bad driver- A successful marriage means not arguing right? Well no matter what you do when you drive, it is an immediate panic attack, and don’t forget, the other driver is always right! Especially if they are a sweet old person. Don’t get me wrong, I love old people, especially when they are genuine, but guys…your driving becomes impaired over time…my grandfather runs red lights and claims he’s good to go, these are things I know.

A successful marriage- Plain and simple

The truth of the matter is marriage is very difficult, it’s a matter of taking preference and desires and making them clear expectation. Like it or not, marriage is when you decide to ultimately make the big sacrifices, to take a person’s feelings serious enough to make them a top priority.

I absolutely do joke about marriage, but then again, I take very little serious. When you watch your own marriage crash and burn you tend to keep an open mind toward how most of them work in general, but regardless, it does’t take away the sour taste in your mouth from having experienced it personally.

Those tips will lead a couple to a successful marriage in days. Don’t hold back the love and fun now, take the step, and with those tips of genuine interest, you will keep that sparkle in her eyes forever.